That’s What Friends Are For…

So…had lunch yesterday with my dear friend, the one who lost her husband in a horrific car accident right before Christmas.  We had a nice lunch, good conversation…and I left feeling very sad.

Then…I get a phone call last night, from someone I consider more than an acquaintance, but not quite a friend.  Someone that I haven’t particulary liked a whole lot in the past.  Seems her husband, whom I have always thought the world of….is having an affair.  Shocked…but I don’t know why I am. 

I’d like to say I always thought better of him than that.  But, I thought worlds better about my husband, thought he was a man of honor and integrity…and he was capable.  All of us are capable of betraying the ones we love.

So I talk to her for a couple of hours last night, and hour or so today.  She’s so hurt, devastated.  She called me, someone she’s not close to, because she knew I would understand.  I’m afraid she thought I would have answers…could help her fix this, because my husband and I are reconciled (or reconciling…it’s gonna be a long ride).  I don’t have answers.  I can tell her MY story.  I can tell her the way I handled things that seemed to be helpful, and things I did that weren’t so hot.  I can tell her about my pain, and how I clung to God and His promises to get through the hell of his affair and abandonment.  I can tell her that I finally told him I give up, let’s be friends and co-parents, let’s move on….and that 2 days later, he started moving towards togetherness and coming home.  I can’t tell her how to ‘fix’ hers. 

My advice…the same advice I followed…work on yourself, talk to God, listen to God…leave your husband in God’s hands.  You cannot control anyone but yourself…You can’t control this situation. Sigh

The same advice I’m still trying to follow, as God finishes what He started.